Wednesday, November 15, 2017

WCC Preview Episode 6: Together


As Episode 6 opens, two detectives make their way to Coach Ken's office.

Detective McNulty
Coach Ken, I'm detective McNulty and this is my partner Bunk Moreland.
We're here to ask you a few questions about a particular player of yours.


Coach Ken
A player of mine?
I'm guessing you two don't watch the XFL.
I've been fired from the Titans.
There are no players of mine.


Detective McNulty
Well Coach, to be frank, Bunk and I have been boycotting the XFL.
Something about those anthem protests really rubbed me the wrong way.
It's unamerican. I don't like it.
Regardless, you still might be of some assistance.
We're looking to Avon Barksdale. Also known as "Jes."
You think we could talk to him?

Coach Ken
Well like I said, I'm no longer the coach of the Titans.
He could be at practice.
Or he may be working at the laundromat.
I really don't know of his whereabouts, officers.

Detective McNulty
Do you know which one?

Coach Ken
I'm not privy to that knowledge detective.
If I may ask, why are you interested in Avon?


Detective Moreland
We have suspicion that Avon may be involved in drug trade in San Francisco.
Selling illegal Fantasy Football Cheatsheets and insider information.
And that he may be running with a well known "player" within the drug world.
Kenneth "Stringer" Bell.
We just have a few questions for the boy.
That's all.


Coach Ken
Well, I don't know of any Kenneth Bells around here.
I'm afraid I can't be of much more help than that.
As far as I know, Avon is a great defensive end for the T.C. Titans.
Nothing more.


Detective McNulty
Alright Coach. But if you find any more information or have any details on Avon's whereabouts.
Please give us a call.


Coach Ken
Will do, officers.
Now if I may, I'm going to ask that you kindly leave my office.
I'm quite busy looking for new head coaching vacancies.


Avon Barksdale
I don't know what you're talking about, Coach.
I ain't involved in no bullshit.

Coach Ken
Well be prepared if the officers come looking for you.
And if you need anything.
I'm right here.


Avon Barksdale
You ain't got nothing to worry about, Coach.
They don't know about you.
They don't know about our business....
Frank.



Narrator
With just 3 weeks left in the regular season, the playoff picture becomes more clear by the day.


Narrator
While some teams prepare as FantasyMania fast approaches....


Narrator
...... Others are left picking up the pieces.

Narrator
In San Francisco, the Mean Machine have shocked the Fantasy World with their re-emergence as a main event caliber Fantasy Team.
The team is led by Carson Wentz, whose play this season have some suggesting that the second year player should be in the running for MVP.
As the 14th round pick by the Permian Panthers, very few predicted that Carson would reach a new level in 2017.
If being drafted so late didn't fuel Carson enough...
Being cut a few weeks after minicamp by the Permian Panthers sure did the trick to ignite the fire behind Carson's MVP-like performance.


Narrator
On the surface, the Mean Machine's rag tag group of wide receivers don't exactly scare anyone.


Narrator
However, the consistent play from this group has been an instrumental part of the team's 5 game winning streak.


Narrator
Perhaps none more impressive than rookie standout JuJu Smith-Schuster.


Narrator
But despite the Mean Machine's recent success on the Fantasy Field...
Some still question Coach Jesse's past.
Having arguably one of the most disappointing Fantasy careers in the WCC,
some question if Coach Jesse can get it done.


Narrator
And it doesn't get any more controversial than allegations that Coach Jesse drops passes on purpose on Sundays during Flag Football.
With a shady past of alleged points shaving, players along with fans, have a hard time trusting Coach Jesse.


Narrator
On Sunday, the Mean Machine face their doppelgänger Coach Howard and the Mud Dogs.


Narrator
As overwhelming underdogs, some compare Howard's Mud Dogs to the Cleveland Browns.
No one really has high expectations and most consider them just along for the ride.


Cooper Kupp
Man, I don't wanna play against the Mean Machine.
Everybody is gonna laugh at us.


D'Angelo Barksdale
Everyone's already laughing at us.
I'm just wasting away out here.
I could be out doing the family business.
Making way more money than any of you have ever seen.

Cooper Kupp
Yeah? What kind of family business?


Coach Howard
I've got it!
Listen up... this'll change the course of our entire season.
We're gonna start Gano at quarterback.
Keep Rob Kelley on our team for weeks.
Hold multiple kickers....
Maybe I'll add another defense to the team!
Defense wins championships.


D'Angelo Barksdale
Man, fuck this.
I'm out.
I'm off to work for my cousin.

*Commercial*


*Commercial*


Emmanuel Sanders
Coach!
I want back on the team.
I'll do anything.
Come on, I need this.


Coach Rockson
You want back on the team?
Why? Because we're WCC Champions?
We won that game without you.
Why do we need you now?


Emmanuel Sanders
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. 


Coach Rockson
Mother fucker, what does that have to do with anything?
You still owe me 567 suicides and 1004 pushups!



The Flames pick up the pieces and help Emmanuel Sanders finish his suicides and pushups.


Coach Del Rio
Hey, I'm gonna be frank with you guys.
What's our chances at FantasyMania?
Almost non-existent.
But still... we're better than the 49ers.
And you know what else?


Coach Del Rio
WE'RE GONNA KICK THAT FLAMING ASS!
BECOME WCC CHAMPIONS!
 AND KEEP THE LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP OUT OF SAN FRANCISCO!

*Commercial*


*Commercial*



Coach Stealthy
0.40 points by Tyler Kroft?
What a load of shit!
0.30 points by Devonta Freeman?
You worthless pieces of trash have the nerve to call yourselves football players?!


Russell Wilson
Hey! Devonta was injured.
What do you want him to do?
Keep playing injured?
You're supposed to be the coach.
You're supposed to have our backs.


Coach Stealthy
What did you say to me boy?
Do you know how sick I am of missing FantasyMania?
Do you know how sick I am of finishing in the top half of the league in points scored, but consistently finishing in the bottom half?!


Coach Stealthy
I don't think you know how badly I need this win.


Russell Wilson
Oh, I know how badly you need to win.
I know about those guys threatening you.
Allow me to share with the rest of the team.
You need to win, not because of FantasyMania.
Not because of your legacy.
No. You need to win because your life depends on it.
Because those men are gonna kill you if you don't win a League Championship.
But the question is...
How are you gonna win the League Championship when you've lost the locker room?



Coach Yoast
Leonard Fournette is becoming a growing problem.
I only see one solution to the situation.
It's not a popular decision, but it's the right one.
I'm stepping down as head coach of the T.C. Titans.

Assistant Coach
What are you crazy?!
They bent over backwards to get you this job.
They'll take away your Hall of Fame vote!


Coach Yoast
To hell with them.
This is about the team.


Coach Yoast
Everyone, I've got an announcement to make.
Team, I hope this season, you've learned as much from me as I've learned from you.
You've taught this country how to come together for a common goal.
You've showed us that it doesn't matter if you're black or white.
Active or inactive.
Rich or poor.
Seattle or San Francisco.
Cousin or no cousin.
We are all in this together.
And it's about time I joined the train.
Coach Ken!
I need your help to win a League Championship.


Coach Ken
This means more than just another Fantasy Football season.
This is more than just Championships.
More than legacy.
This is about the future of our country.
This is about defeating racism.
And we're going to do that.
Together.

Avon Barksdale
Defeating racism?
It can't be done, Coach.
We'll lose.

Coach Ken
Then we'll do that together as well.


Justin Tucker
LEFT SIDE!

Avon Barksdale
STRONG SIDE!

Justin Tucker
LEFT SIDE!

Avon Barksdale
STRONG SIDE!


Justin Tucker
LEFT SIDE!

































Minh Wyatt
It can't be done...
Hehehahahaha...
This power is overwhelming.
Without The Star in Dallas, no one can contain the powers of this artifact.


Minh Wyatt
I must rid the WCC Universe of this infernal stone.


Paul Heyman
Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Paul Heyman and I am here on behalf of my client... 
Lord Caldlow.
Minh Wyatt, clearly you are unfit to carry such an element with infinite powers.
However, my client has offered to relieve you of your duties and ask that you hand over the Fantasy Stone.

Minh Wyatt
Lord Caldlow?
I've never heard of such a man and surely this mere mortal is incapable of wielding a Fantasy Stone.


Paul Heyman
Oh, I beg to differ, Minh Wyatt.
I assure you, Lord Caldlow is more than capable of wielding a Fantasy Stone.
And he doesn't need The Star in Dallas to do so.
I asked you kindly.
Now, I am demanding you.
Hand over the Fantasy Stone or face the destruction brought upon you by Lord Caldlow.


Paul Heyman laughs as WCC Preview goes off the air.


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