The TVA
Intercom
Transferring back to holding.
Prisoner #4479 - Kendrick Stark.
Jimmy McGill-3756
The hell were you thinking, Kendrick?
You know Judge Renslayer is going to have your ass
if you keep it up with these escape attempts.
And I'm speaking out of self preservation here,
because I'm just as likely to get pruned here as you are, my friend.
Kendrick Stark-4479
Relax, McGill.
Nothing is going to happen.
Jimmy McGill-3756
Yeah? And what makes you so sure?
Kendrick Stark-4479
Because I found them.
Jimmy McGill-3756
Found who?
Kendrick Stark-4479
The Timekeepers.
Kendrick Stark-4479
I found the Timekeepers, but it was nothing but a sham.
This whole place is bullshit, McGill.
Jimmy McGill-3756
What are you talking about?
Kendrick Stark-4479
Those Timekeepers aren't real!
Kendrick Stark-4479
I found them and took one of their heads off.
But they were nothing.
Just a robot with fancy buttons and hardwiring.
Just another game, just another manipulation.
Jimmy McGill-3756
What does that mean?
Kendrick Stark-4479
It means that everything about this place is fake.
All of it.
The TVA, the multiverse, time travel. It's all one big lie.
Come on, McGill. Weren't you a con man?
Can't you see?
This has the Special Effects Stone written all over it.
Jimmy McGill-3756
But how is that possible?
I've seen things in the TVA... unexplainable things.
Kendrick Stark-4479
Yeah? Like what?
A talking animated clock?
Don't tell me you believe this shit?
I must have lost the Fantasy Stones.
Maybe Thanos still has them...
But I should've snapped him away when I had the chance.
Strange was right.
And now, I've put us all in danger.
Jimmy McGill-3756
What if you're wrong?
What if all of this is real?
Kendrick Stark-4479
I'm not wrong.
And I think I know how I'm going to get out of here.
Jimmy McGill-3756
How?
Kendrick Stark-4479
When I made it to the Timekeepers, I saw a giant tower.
But I wasn't able to get inside.
I'm sure whoever is behind all of this, is inside that tower.
Jimmy McGill-3756
So what are you planning?
Kendrick Stark-4479
I'm planning to go back up there and find out who is behind all of this.
And you're going to help me.
WEST COAST COUSINS
FOREVER
Episode Eleven - Souled Out
Earth-316
Jim Ross
We come to you live from Compaq Arena in Arlington, Texas.
It is Week 11 in the West Coast Cousins.
We have a full slate of matchups this Sunday, including the Underchucker vs. Chris Vinson.
The Baugh vs. Rock Michaels, and much, much more.
But first, we direct your attention to the center of the ring,
as Mr. McMahon is prepared to make an announcement.
Mr. McMahon
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Wednesday Night Preview!
*Crowd Boos*
Crowd
ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE!
Mr. McMahon
And as you can see, just over my left shoulder,
I am carrying the WCCF Championship.
The same WCCF League Championship that was won at last year's FantasyMania.
Which could only mean one thing.
Introducing last season's League Champion... the Greatest of All Time!
STONE COLD STEVE PUPSTIN!
*Pupstin's Music Hits*
*Crowd Boos*
Jim Ross
It is about time we get some answers, King.
It has been over 10 months since we have seen Stone Cold on WCCF television.
Pupstin has not made a public appearance since FantasyMania,
since the infamous screw job.
And it is about time since he faced the music.
In my eyes, Stone Cold is nothing but a no good, yellow bellied coward.
I, for one, have been waiting a long time for an explanation.
He owes us that much, damnit.
King
He doesn't owe you a damn thing, JR.
Stone Cold does what he wants, when he wants.
And if he didn't want to show up for the first 11 weeks of the new season,
he doesn't have to! He's the greatest, he can take a season off.
And now that Mr. McMahon and Stone Cold are on the same page,
the rest of the league is in serious trouble.
Jim Ross
Never in my wildest dreams, would I have ever imagined a scenario,
a situation, quite like this.
I feel like I am living a damned nightmare, King.
King
You'd better wake up and face reality, JR.
Stone Cold is dancing with the devil.
Mr. McMahon
Stone Cold, it has been 10 long months,
since we have seen you in a WCCF Ring.
And the question on everyone's mind is, where has Stone Cold been?
Well, the truth is, I gave Stone Cold some time off.
After winning a record breaking 4th League Championship,
he has earned as much.
He earned it by carrying this league on his back for 11 years.
Stone Cold, you are without a doubt, the greatest of all time.
You and I, we've had our differences.
You've been a pain in my ass and I have made your life a living hell.
Stone Cold, without a doubt, you are a complete asshole.
But now, you're my asshole!
*Crowd Boos*
Mr. McMahon
Stone Cold, if there's one thing that you've shown me throughout the years...
Whether it be through ticket sales, merchandise, storylines, accolades,
Championship reigns, Yahoo Trophies, you've done it all.
You've shown me that you are the absolute best
that the West Coast Cousins has to offer.
There is not a single Fantasy Manager in this league
that comes close to what you have accomplished in the WCCF.
Last season, you cemented your legacy as the undisputed Greatest of All Time.
You have reached the very pinnacle of the West Coast Cousins.
Mr. McMahon
You did it, when you beat the living hell out of my son in law, Single H.
Single H, the only other Fantasy Manager that was a threat to the title of Greatest of All Time.
The only other Fantasy Manager that had a chance to take away what's yours.
And what did you do, Stone Cold?
You EMBARRASED that son of a bitch!
You took Single H to school!
You made him... your bitch!
*Crowd Boos*
Mr. McMahon
And so without further adieu, it is my great honor,
to present you with your 4th League Championship.
Give it up... for STONE COLD STEVE PUPSTIN!
*Crowd Boos*
Jim Ross
Give me a break!
Are we just going to ignore the circumstances in which he won that title?
King
You better watch yourself, JR.
We're in the presence of greatness.
Steve Pupstin
First of all.
I want to thank you, Mr. McMahon.
Crowd
WHAT?
Steve Pupstin
I said, I want to thank you, Mr. McMahon!
Crowd
WHAT?
Steve Pupstin
Last season, all playoffs long, the entire WCC Universe counted me out.
They said I couldn't get the job done.
They said he isn't better than the Icon, Alex.
Crowd
WHAT?
Steve Pupstin
They said he couldn't beat The Game without Derrick Henry.
Crowd
WHAT?
Steve Pupstin
They said he just doesn't have it anymore.
Crowd
WHAT?
Steve Pupstin
They said he's past his prime and his glory days are behind him...
Well to that, I've only got one thing to say about that.
What are they gonna say now?
Because at the end of the day, when it's all said and done.
There was one man.
One man that believed in Stone Cold.
And that man is none other than Vincent Kennedy McMahon!
*Crowd Boos*
Steve Pupstin
All offseason, I heard it all.
Damar Hamlin this, Damar Hamlin that.
Stone Cold didn't win his 4th Championship fair and square.
As far as most of these so-called fans are concerned, that match never should've ended.
They say, if the game wasn't cancelled, Stone Cold would've lost to Single H.
Well, I don't work in hypotheticals.
Because if "ifs" were fifths, we'd all be drunk!
King
Ha ha! Pupstin's probably already drunk!
Steve Pupstin
The fact of the matter is, the match ended how it ended.
And the final score read 90.62 - 82.90
for the winner... by UNANIMOUS DECISION...
STONE COLD STEVE PUPSTIN!
*Crowd Boos*
Steve Pupstin
And if you want someone to blame,
blame the son of a bitch who caused all of this.
Blame Tee Higgins.
He's the son of a bitch who played for Single H.
He's the one who ended the match.
He's the one you want? Isn't that right?
Steve Pupstin
No, no. Allow me to let you all in on a little secret.
It wasn't the hit that caused Hamlin to go into cardiac arrest.
Jim Ross
What?
King
What's he talking about, JR?
Do you know about this?
Jim Ross
I have no idea what he's talking about, King.
Steve Pupstin
You see. Stone Cold isn't gonna let something like that up to chance.
Stone Cold isn't going to put it into the hands of the Buffalo Defense.
This was for all the marbles. This was for the GOAT title.
Damar Hamlin's heart didn't stop by accident.
Damar Hamlin was poisoned!
Jim Ross
WHAT?
You have got to be kidding me!
What kind of sick, twisted individual are we dealing with here?
Steve Pupstin
But don't you worry.
All you social justice warriors out there, don't you fret about it.
Because I am sorry about Damar.
I am. But he's alive isn't he?
He's fine, just as I planned it.
Don't you think I knew exactly how much to give him?
I had it all measured out.
Damar Hamlin was just another pawn in my game.
*Crowd Boos*
Jim Ross
This is sick... this is not right.
I cannot believe Pupstin would stoop to such levels.
Steve Pupstin
My actions should tell you what this title means to me.
And if you aren't willing to do what it takes to be the Champion,
you aren't trying hard enough.
So you can stop calling that other son of a bitch the "Cerebral Sandwich."
Because there isn't another Fantasy Manager in this league that is more cerebral,
methodical, and willing to go the extra mile, than Stone Cold!
And because of what I am willing to do,
I am now the Greatest of All Time.
And that's the bottom line... cause Stone Cold said so!
Mr. McMahon
There you have it, folks.
The Greatest of All Time.
And now that Vince McMahon and Stone Cold are on the same page,
there is not a force in the West Coast Cousins that can stop us!
Stone Cold Steve Pupstin, ladies and gentlemen!
*Crowd Boos*
Jim Ross
I am going to throw up, King.
I cannot believe my ears.
Pupstin has doubled down on his actions.
This man may be the most sadistic son of a bitch that I have ever seen.
Why?? Damnit, why?
King
I think we have have seriously underestimated the length Stone Cold will go to,
to win Fantasy Football games, JR.
And now with these two at the helm, who knows what could happen next.
We cut to a shot of Single H watching the broadcast
as the crowd erupts into cheers.
*Commercial*
*Commercial*
Earth-415
Jaylen Warren
Wait, so you just gave the QB1 Glasses to Mark Zuckerberg?
Christopher Parker
Yeah? What's wrong with that?
He's going to help build Ultron.
Jaylen Warren
And Mr. Stark was okay with this?
Christopher Parker
I mean, yeah.
Why wouldn't he be?
Meta is working with Martha Industries and we're building it together.
Jaylen Warren
Have you actually seen the code?
Has he given you any updates on the progress?
Christopher Parker
Well... no.
But Beck assures me that everything is going to plan.
Jaylen Warren
Isn't this your senior project? I think you should be more involved than you are.
And you know Zuckerberg stole Facebook, right?
What makes you think he isn't doing it again?
Christopher Parker
Come on.. there's no way.
Jaylen Warren
Let's login to your account and see what's going on.
Warren see's Parker's Fantasy Team.
Jaylen Warren
Dude.. is this your Fantasy Team?
You've lost 3 straight, how are you even managing your team?
Am I your best running back?
I'm not even the RB1 on my own team!
Christopher Parker
I had homework during the draft..
Jaylen Warren
Okay, whatever. Forget about that.
Let's look at your Meta account.
Christopher Parker
Sure log in.
My password is ImHimShutDownDB2023.
ACCESS DENIED
Christopher Parker
That can't be right...
Jaylen Warren
Are you sure you didn't forget your password?
Let's try again.
ACCESS DENIED
YOUR ACCOUNT HAS BEEN LOCKED
Jaylen Warren
Dude, it says here that your account has been terminated
from the Ultron Project.
Christopher Parker
This has to be a mistake.
It's a misunderstanding, it has to be.
I'm going to Meta next week to find out what's happening.
*Commercial*
*Commercial*
As Minhneto aims to remain in first place in Week 10,
Keenan Allen scores 29.50.
Minhneto
It's all but over, Wolverine.
You've lost again.
And now at 3-7, you won't be able to catch me.
Your playoff hopes are over.
Vinpool watches as Minhneto prepares for the final blow to Kevan.
Vinpool
Hey, Minhneto!
Leave him alone! That's my friend...
And I'm sick of you carrying yourself like you're the best Fantasy Manager in the league.
How can you be the best Manager, when you didn't even start a QB this week?
William Styrker
Vinson! What are you doing?
Vinpool
What I should've done a long time ago...
Break the script!
---------------------------------------------------
Vinpool's Season Objective:
Beat Minhneto
(Finish the Season Ahead of Chuckanuts)
---------------------------------------------------
Vinpool fires at Minhneto,
distracting him as Kevan is momentarily able to get away,
causing Minh to lose in Week 10 and placing Vinson in first place.
Minhneto
Wade Vinson.
You have made a serious mistake.
Stryker was your best chance at winning a playoff game.
You could've had a great season, but now it all comes to an end.
You will learn the hard way.
*Commercial*
Kang the Conqueror
Here's a personal question for you.
When you look into your future,
do you see a life full of obstacles? Or possibilities?
Be all you can be.
*Commercial*
Black Manager
WAKANDA FOREVER!
Black Baugh
You are a fool, Black Manager.
And your people will suffer for it.
Thor Rocksinson, we are Gods.
Together, we can rule this entire planet.
Let's end this, here and now.
Thor Rocksinson
The Black Manager asked you to leave.
You should've listened.
Black Baugh
So you're siding with the mortals?
Thor Rocksinson
Just bring it, bitch!
Thor Rocksinson meets Black Baugh face to face
as the Gods duel it out.
Tyler Boyd with 11.70.
Black Baugh's defense scores 8 points,
as he's able to avoid Rocksinson's initial attacks.
And as Brock Purdy returns to the starting lineup,
he drops 23.84 points, sending Baugh flying into a nearby building.
But there isn't much offense outside of that,
as Rocksinson only able to score 86.84, losing in Week 10.
The Black Manager gets involved, as the battle for Wakanda begins.
12.90 from Tank Dell, as the rookie scores a touchdown.
16 points from Indy defense,
as Baugh's workhorse Etienne is stifled for only 4.40.
13.50 from Jonathan Taylor.
But this only pisses Black Baugh off,
Devin Singletary goes for 22.10.
Dak and Lamb combine for 77 points
as Black Baugh crushes the Black Manager, 143.36 - 95.82.
Black Baugh
There's a new king in town.
Bow down to the Black Baugh.
Chigoziem Okonkwo
Wakanda has fallen...
T'Vincent
Not yet... we have one last hope.
We must make the playoffs and defeat the Black Baugh.
