West Coast Cousins Fantasy Football: 2013-10-27

[Cole]

Welcome to Wednesday Night Preview!

We're live in Boston, Massachusetts and we kick off the show with the WCC Champion!

John Seana!

Seana enters the ring to a mixed ovation.

[Seana]
How is everyone doing?!

*Crowd Boos*

[Seana]
Well, I'm used to hearing that now a days.
So I'll cut straight to the chase.
For two weeks now...
THE CHAMP...

Seana is cut off by Chuckanut's music.

Chuckanut makes his way down the ring and grabs a microphone.

[Chuckanut]
Seana, you have something that belongs to me.
That shiny gold spinny thing. That piece of metal is mine.
I am now the new Number 1 Ranked WCC Superstar and I have won 5 straight games.
I am the Undisputed Number 1 Overall Superstar.
And the WCC Champion is sitting in 6th place?
You see John, you aren't the real WCC Champion.
I am.
You've just been holding my title for me.
But this Sunday, I'm here to claim what is mine.

[Chuckanut]
I am the most dominant Superstar in this league and have been for quite some time.
5 straight wins. And now I'm staking my claim for the WCC Championship.
I'm taking it all.
The Welterweight Champion, the WCC Championship and the 2013 League Championship.
No one can stop me...

CM PUP's music hits.

[Cole]
And remember King, it was CM PUP who lost to Chuckanut last night and dropped to second place in the league..

[CM PUP]
Undisputed Number 1 Overall Superstar in the league?
Are you kidding me?
No one has been more dominant over the course of the last two seasons.
And yeah, you're number 1 right now, but to say you're undisputed is an over exaggeration if I've ever heard one.
Last night, you beat me by a 1 measly point.
With Marshawn Lynch left to play on Monday Night, you just barely won the game with an embarrassing 2.70 points from your star running back.

[CM PUP]
No. You're not the best.
I still have the most points on the season and I'm still projected to win this league.
And yeah, you've won 5 straight games, congratulations.
I've been number 1 for 5 straight weeks!
And did I receive one title shot during my reign on top?
Of course, I didn't.
But you? Your first week on top and you are gifted a title shot?
No. I say, we go one on one to determine not only who is the real best in the league... but we determine the number 1 contender for the WCC Championship.
And no, Chuckanut, I don't want to face you.
Because you suck.
I want The Underchucker.
So I don't care what evil ritual you gotta do to summon The Underchucker, but I want the Deadman.
I don't care if you have to bring out your little Ouiji Board, do whatever you gotta do to bring The Underchucker out here. Because you aren't good enough to face me.
I want Chucker and I'm gonna break The Streak, and then I'm gonna take the WCC Championship from that colorful t-shirt wearing fraud of a Champion this Sunday at Armageddon!

*Crowd Cheers*

[Seana]
I think that's a great way to put it...
And based on the crowd reaction, I think this Boston crowd agrees!
CM PUP versus Chuckanut for the Number 1 Contender tonight on Preview!

*Crowd Cheers*

CM PUP rolls his eyes at John Seana.

[Seana]
One more time... Number 1 vs. Number 2.
Who deserves to face me for the WCC Championship this Sunday?
Both Superstars are deserving of this title shot and there's only one way to find out who should get it!
May the best man win!

*Crowd Cheers*

[Chuckanut]
Well, PUP. I accept.
You and me, one more time.
And once I beat you for a second time, you'll come to a realization that your reign on top is over.
You're on your way down. Two losses in a row.
You are the coldest Superstar in the WCC.
And I won't need The Underchucker to beat you.

Because once I'm through with you, you'll be the dead man.

PIPE BOMB....

*Commercial*

Backstage Segment

Nyback is found talking to a cafeteria worker.

[Nyback]
You call this soup?!
This tastes like garbage!
What is wrong with you?!
FEED ME MORE!

[Nyback]
*Laughs*
Nyback Rules!

Across the hallway, Paul Heyman is with Curtis Axel when he see's what Nyback just did.

[Heyman]
What is wrong with this guy?
All he does is bully WCC staff members.
I'm gonna have a talk with him...

Heyman walks over to Nyback.

[Heyman]
Listen Nyback. I don't know if you get a thrill out of bullying people and I don't really care.
But I just wonder if you plan on playing Fantasy Football ever again?
Regardless, I need the assistance of The Shield.
And I know you have some sort of deal with them.
Maybe you're the leader of The Shield... maybe not.
Whatever the case may be, I need to hire The Shield to help CM PUP tonight against Chuckanut.

[Nyback]
I AM The Shield!

[Heyman]
Okay, you are The Shield.
Whatever. I just need their assistance tonight.

[Nyback]
It'll come at a price.

[Heyman]
Name it.

[Nyback]
Cook me some really good soup.

The camera cuts away ringside where The Crock's music hits and the Boston crowd erupts.

[King]
We're joined by The Great One, Cole!
I can't wait to hear what The Crock has to say, he's so good on the microphone.

[King]
Wait a minute Michael...

[King]
That's not The Crock... it's The Hiz.

The crowd slowly realizes that The Hiz is dressed as The Crock and begin to boo.

The Hiz poses as the crowd continues to boo.

[The Hiz]
FINALLY...
THE CROCK....
IS....
AWWWWWWESOMEEEEEEE!

*Crowd Boos*

[The Hiz]
You idiots didn't think The Crock was actually gonna be here tonight, did you?
If you're all too stupid to realize that The Crock doesn't care about you, then you're all dumber than I thought!

*Crowd Boos*

[The Hiz]
The Crock doesn't care about any of you.
He just wants your money.
He doesn't care about the WCC...
And you all can talk about how I'm the most inactive player in the league...
But I have the same exact record as The Crock!
2 and 6....
I am just as good as The Crock...
In fact, I am BETTER than The Crock.

The Crock appears on the Titantron.

[The Crock]
Hello Hiz.
You talk as if you know anything about The Crock.
You say The Crock doesn't care.
You better know damn well, The Crock cares.
Oh yeah, The Crock cares.
He would love nothing more than to be there LIVE in Boston, Massachusetts!
But unfortunately, The Crock is home in LA filming Fast 7, 8 and 9.
But don't you dare say The Crock doesn't care about the WCC.
The Crock was born in the WCC.
The Crock bleeds WCC.
The Crock loves the WCC.
This league was The Crock's very first Fantasy League back in 2009, The Crock grew up in the WCC!
And this Sunday at Armageddon, The Crock is gonna lay the smackdown on your candy ass!

[The Hiz]
Surprise... surprise...
The Crock live via satellite.
Tell me something Crock, how are you gonna whoop my candy ass this Sunday if you're not physically on the show?
What? You're gonna play Fantasy Football live via satellite?

[The Hiz]
You don't care about these people.
And you lie to their face every time you come back to the WCC and say you're never leaving again...
And then you leave again.
Just admit it Crock, you don't care the same way that I don't care.

[The Hiz]
The only difference between you and me Crock...
You're washed up. You're the bottom of the barrel and you are trying your best.
Meanwhile, I don't have to change my lineup or add any players, and I'll still finish ahead of you.
And you want to know why?
Because I'm THE HIZ...
AND I'M......

From out of no where The Crock runs into the ring and hits a Spinebuster on The Hiz!

*Crowd Cheers*

[King]
Wait a minute Cole!
He's here!
The Crock is LIVE right here on Boston!

The Crock poses as we go to commercial break.

*Commercial*

*Commercial*

Wednesday Night Preview returns as we find Paul Heyman talking on the phone.

[Heyman]
What do you mean Campbell's Chunky soup doesn't deliver?
Okay, so Clay Matthews is busy, what about Donovan McNabb or Victor Cruz?
Come on! You're killing me here. I really need this soup delivered as soon as possible..

CM PUP walks on camera.

[CM PUP]
What is this about me hearing that you hired The Shield tonight?
You don't think I can beat Chuckanut on my own?
You think I need The Shield?
I only lost by a point last night. I don't need The Shield.
I can do it on my own. And I'm gonna show everyone out there why I'm the best.

[Heyman]
It's not that PUP... I know you're the best.
But it wouldn't hurt to have a little insurance policy.
I mean, had The Shield intervened last night, you would be Welterweight Champion right now.
You would still be number 1.
PUP, have I ever done you wrong?
I know what is best for you, and I need you to trust me.

[CM PUP]
No, Paul. You call them off.
I'm gonna finish this myself.

CM PUP leaves.

Heyman appears distraught.

[Heyman]
I wasn't able to deliver the soup anyways..

John Seana's music hits and we're joined back at ringside.

[Seana]
This is gonna be good!
Let's find me a Number 1 Contender!

Seana joins the commentary table.

[Cole]
Welcome Seana. How are you?

[Seana]
I'm good, Michael. You look like you gained a little weight, it's good.

[Cole]
Ha. Well you know that JR's BBQ sauce is so delicious..

[Seana]
Alright! Let's determine a number 1 contender!

Number 1 Contender's Match
Percy PUP Harvin vs. Chuckanut

CM PUP's music plays.

Out comes the Number 2 Ranked WCC Superstar.

Chuckanut comes out in his original form to face CM PUP.

The bell rings and this match is underway.

[Cole]
Seana, do you have a preference as to who you'll play this Sunday?

[Seana]
You know, I really don't have a preference.
I think these two are both amazing Fantasy Football Players.
They make all the right moves, and add the best players.
I think they'll both pose a competitive challenge this Sunday and I look forward to it.
I think they both bring something different to the table and I think the fans will enjoy it one way or another. It's Number 1 and Number 2, it doesn't get any better than that.

[Heyman]
Break his arm! Break his arm!

[Cole]
If you do face Chuckanut, are you at all worried that he'll come to Armageddon in his undefeated form? The Underchucker?

[Seana]
You know, if he comes as The Underchucker, that's great. Or if he comes as Chuckanut, that's great too. It really doesn't matter, both his characters have been solid this season. 5 straight wins, I know he's gonna bring it no matter what he does. The Underchucker has been unstoppable thus far, but I think I can be the one to beat The Streak. But if he shows up as Chuckanut, it's gonna be just as challenging. And CM PUP as well, he beat me earlier this season, but I feel that I have a much stronger team now and I'm ready to avenge that loss.