Jim Ross
70,807 packed inside AT&T stadium here in Dallas, Texas for the conclusion of the 2017 West Coast Cousins Fantasy Football season here at FantasyMania.
The pyros explode as Week 16 kicks off.
Jim Ross
Good evening folks, Jim Ross alongside Jerry "The King" Lawyer for the final week in the West Coast Cousins.
Thank you for joining us in this historic night as we crown a new Champion.
King, it's been a hell of a season thus far, another one for the books.
What are your thoughts as we prepare for the final game of the year?
The King
It's definitely been an exciting season to say the least.
An influx of new storylines, new characters, everyone wanted to know how the Sports Movie Cinematic Universe would go and I, for one, have thoroughly enjoyed this season.
A lot of controversy as to whether or not the XFL would last beyond a single season, but we have our answer now.
The House of Representatives have made a decision.
We have multiple XFL seasons to look forward to!
Jim Ross
Yes, indeed King.
But for now, tonight, we settle the matter of the 2017 season.
Who will be the new Champion?
No Permian Panthers, no TC Titans.
It's down to the former World Champion, Coach Rockson and the Flames versus Coach Jesse and the Mean Machine.
Both teams pulled off massive upsets last week, and now they're one win away from winning it all.
Who takes home the title?
[5] The Flames (7-6)
[3] The Mean Machine (8-5)
The King
Ah! Check it out, JR!
It's Vice President Mike Pence!
Just like President Trump promised.
He's a man of his word, JR!
Jim Ross
Yeah... would've been nice to see the man himself show up instead of sending one of his cronies.
Jim Ross
But nonetheless, a number of celebrities on hand to witness this historic moment in Fantasy Football.
Jim Ross
Jay-Z and Beyonce in attendance tonight.
The King
We're in the presence of hip hop royalty JR!
Show some respect!
Jim Ross
Rapper Chance the Rapper also in the building.
The King
It's Batman, JR!
Ah ha! What a night.
The King
Ah look! It's our very own narrator for WCC Preview.
Liev Schreiber!
Jim Ross
Rapper Fiddy Cent is also in town.
And it looks like our very own Renee Young is gonna get an interview.
Renee Young
Fiddy, it's so wonderful to see you here at FantasyMania.
Are you a big fan of the sport?
What brings you to such a historic event such as this?
50 Cent
Well, you know, I've always been a fan of the competitive nature of the actual sport of Fantasy Football.
An' actually, it's a lot like hip hop.
The actual competitive environment of actual competition, you know?
It's a lot of fun and I look forward to watching the actual game.
Cause it's the competitive nature that drives the product of Fantasy Football.
And the actual consumer wants to see actual football.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Renee Young
Not really.
Back to you, JR.
The King
Actor Denzel Washington is ringside!
I loved him in that football movie about football.
Jim Ross
Kevin Kelly is standing by with Tom Brady.
Tom Brady
I wouldn't miss this for the world, Kevin.
I'd love to be actually playing tonight, but it is what it is.
I'm just here to support the XFL and I'm really excited for what this league has to offer.
I'm just hoping for an exciting game, it's gonna be a shootout for sure.
Back and forth, fireworks, that's what I'm predicting.
Jim Ross
And of course the chairman of the board, Vincent Kennedy McMahon, is in attendance with his good friend Jerry Jones.
Now, let's take a look back at the season for these two Fantasy Teams.
The Flames
Drew Brees has done it again!
Simply mesmerizing with his play this season.
Melvin Gordon in for Six!
Touchdown Flames!
When you look at this team, one of it's strengths is definitely the running back position.
The 3 headed monster of Gordon, Collins and Howard.
It's doesn't get much better in a 12 team league.
And the Flames are headed to FantasyMania 9 after defeating the Permian Panthers 90.34 to 89.88.
Narrowly outpointing the #1 seed, Panthers.
Led by Carson Wentz, the Mean Machine are the surprise team of the year.
They've come out of nowhere to make their claim as a contender in the XFL.
Oh no! Oh no!
Carson Wentz is down and it doesn't look good.
Stephen A. Smith
The Mean Machine simply cannot go on without Carson Wentz.
I'm sorry, but their season is over!
Who can possibly carry this team to the Championship?
Blake Bortles?
Are you kidding me!
Jim Ross
And a sensational performance by Blake Bortles!
The Mean Machine picking up right where they left off.
Kareem Hunt with a marvelous performance.
He's definitely in contention for rookie of the year.
Touchdown Ju Ju Smith Schuster!
The Mean Machine play with a certain ferocity.
They're hungry for a Championship and they'll take no prisoners until they get there.
Uh oh... perhaps the hottest team in Fantasy Sports just added arguably the best running back in the league in Ezekiel Elliott.
Having dominated as an Outlaw, the superstar running back was cut from the team for violating team policy.
He signs with the Mean Machine in what will surely make headlines throughout the XFL.
The Flames take on the Mean Machine in the main event of FantasyMania 9.
The Showcase of Immortals.
Justin Roberts
The following contest is scheduled for one fall...
Crowd
ONE FALL!
Justin Roberts
And it is for the 2017 League Championship!
*Crowd Cheers*
Justin Roberts
Introducing first... representing the Flames at running back...
Number 24, Jordan Howard!
Justin Roberts
Also at running back, number 34, Alex Collins!
Justin Roberts
From the San Diego Chargers, Melvin Gordon!
Justin Roberts
At wideout, Number 11, Larry Fitzgerald!
Justin Roberts
And at tightend, from the Carolina Panthers, Greg Olsen!
Justin Roberts
And at Quarterback....
Justin Roberts
Representing the New Orleans Saints, from Purdue University...
NUMBER 9.....
Justin Roberts
DREWWWWWWW
BREEEEEEEEES!
*Crowd Cheers*
Justin Roberts
And their opponents....
Justin Roberts
At quarterback, representing the Mean Machine, number 5, Blake Bortles!
Justin Roberts
At wide receiver, number 15, Golden Tate!
Justin Roberts
Also at the wide receiver position, number 19, Ju Ju Smith Schuster!
Justin Roberts
From the Kansas City Chiefs, running back, KAREEEEM HUNT!
Justin Roberts
Also at running back, from the Minnesota Vikings, Jerick McKinnon!
Justin Roberts
AND.... FROM THE DALLAS COWBOYS...
Making his return to the WCC....
At halfback, NUMBER 21....
EZEKIEEEEEEL
ELLIOOOOOOTT!
Ezekiel Elliott is hyped before kickoff.
Justin Roberts
And now... we ask that you please rise and remove your caps for the singing of our National Anthem...
Jennifer Hudson
Oh Say Can You See.....
Across the stadium, many fans in attendance stand for the National Anthem.
On the field, players are mixed in their decision to stand or kneel.
The King
What a standup guy, Larry Fitzgerald is.
And he stood for our country!
That's a true American.
Why can't they be more like him?
Jim Ross
I'm not sure I quite understand what you're getting at, King.
WCC League Championship Match
[3] The Mean Machine (8-5)
vs.
[5] The Flames (7-6)
Justin Roberts
Ladies and gentlemen, we welcome you to the MAAAAAAIN EVENT of the evening.
Brought to you by Tecate.
Introducing first, in the blue corner.
Holding a professional FantasyMania record of 5 wins and 0 losses...
The undefeated Fantasy Manager by way of San Francisco, California...
Mr. FantasyMania...
Coach Rockson and the FLAAAAAMES!
Justin Roberts
And in the red corner, making his Championship game debut.
From San Francisco, California. Holding a professional FantasyMania record of 3 wins and 4 losses....
Coach Jesse and the MEAAAAAN
MAAAAAACHINEEEEEE!
Jim Ross
Stephen Gostkowski with the kickoff and the 2017 WCC Championship Game is underway!
The Flames start off with Alex Collins rushing for 51 yards, adding 15 receiving yards.
Jerick McKinnon of the Mean Machine responds back with 5.10 points.
Bortles deep down the sideline...
He finds Keelan Cole for the first down!
The Flames feature Jordan Howard early in the matchup.
Howard breaks loose for a big gain!
Touchdown Flames!
The Flame take an early lead behind Jordan Howard's 16.40 points.
Brees drops back
And he finds Martvias Bryant!
Touchdown Flames!
The Mean Machine respond with Kareem Hunt.
16.60 from Hunt to counter Jordan Howard.
Melvin Gordon breaks loose for 81 rush yards.
Touchdown Flames!
Gordon mocking John Seana's "You Can't See Me!"
Ezekiel Elliott makes his return as the Mean Machine feed him early and often.
97 rush yards on the ground amounting to 11.80 from the Superstar running back.
Larry Fitzgerald gets into it now pushing the Mean Machine defense back.
And an amazing catch by the future hall of famer!
Touchdown Flames!
18.74 points from Larry Fitzgerald!
The Flame tuning up the band!
Jim Ross
Sweet Chin Music!
Sweet Chin Music!
1-2-3!
Winner via Pinfall and the NEW 2017 WCC League Champion:
The Flames
Jim Ross
The Rock Breaking Kid has done it!
Coach Rockson is back on top of the West Coast Cousins!
6-0 at FantasyMania and now a 2x League Champion!
The King
An amazing performance all playoffs for that Fantasy Manager.
The Circle of Champions remains in tact and now every Champion is a multi-world Champion.
The Flames celebrate on the sideline as Larry Fitzgerald is now a Champion.
The crowd is going nuts.
And a disappointing ending for the Mean Machine.
Regaining relevance in the WCC, but falling just short of becoming a World Champion.
The journey begins again next year for Coach Jesse and the Mean Machine.
Coach Rockson
The who?
The Flames
FLAMES!
Members of the Mean Machine stay on the field and watch as the Flames celebrate their Championship victory.
Coach Rockson
THE WHO?
The Flames
THE FLAMES!
Fans storm the field as the trophy presentation begins.
Jim Ross
What a moment for Drew Brees.
There is nothing like winning a WCC League Championship!
The Finals MVP goes to Larry Fitzgerald who took the team to the next level in the Championship game.
Single H
Vince... Vince...
Vice President Pence has left the building.
Single H
And according to my sources, President Trump has arrived.
Mr. McMahon
What?
Trump is here?!
Bring him to me!
I'm gonna have him join the "Mr. McMahon, Kiss My Ass Club!"
Regional Zone Manager of Chevrolet, Rikk Wilde is here to present Coach Rockson with a brand new SUV.
Rikk Wilde
Thanks. Rockson, congratulations.
Um, as the official sponsor, or, I mean.
The official vehicle of the XFL, Chevrolet is proud to um, participate in this Championship game.
*Sigh*
Uhh... we're extremely honored to uh, give back to this sport.
Um, at Chevrolet, we have, um...
We have also been proud to have the greatest, latest, and um, greatest technology in our truck lineup.
Which is the all new 2015 Chevy Colorado.
Um, it combines class winning, and leading, uhh..
You know, technology and stuff.
It's the latest and greatest.
It has wifi.
To recognize your performance in this Championship game, I'm proudly presenting to you...
The keys to a brand new 2015 Chevy Colorado.
Rikk Wilde
Congratulations!
Coach Rockson takes the new whip for a ride around Dallas to celebrate with the fans.
President Trump
Don't adjust your sets.
Welcome to the Donald Trump School of Driving!
Gentlemen! Start your screaming!
President Trump
Hahaha!
Maybe it's a bad time to mention this...
but my license is expired!
President Trump
Just relax.
I'll take care of the squealing, wretched, pinhead puppets of the West Coast Cousins!
President Trump
You gotta admit!
I played this stinking country like a harp from hell!
Ahahahaha
Balor runs away from the scene of the crime.
John Seana chases after him.
President Trump
To Tom Brady:
Bring me the Fantasy Stone.
The celebration continues in Dallas as the Flames hoist up the WCC Championship.
President Trump
Destiny still arrives.
The field at AT&T stadium explodes.
Jim Ross
WHAT IN THE---
Mr. McMahon is shocked in disbelief.
His luxury suite explodes shortly after.
Jim Ross
MY GOD! MY GOD!
COMPLETE AND UTTER PANDEMONIUM HERE AT FANTASYMANIA!
THE FIELD JUST EXPLODED!
KING, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!
Across the city, destruction in Dallas continues.
Jim Ross
MY GOD... FOLKS...
WHAT IS GOIN--
The entire AT&T stadium collapses.
T H E 2 0 1 7
W E S T C O A S T C O U S I N S
F A N T A S Y L E A G U E
Based on a True Story.
Shortly after the destruction of AT&T stadium, the XFL was disbanded.
After leaving the XFL, the Little Giant's star receiver, Adam Thielen became addicted to blue meth.
The T.C. Titan's linebacker Gerry Bertier became a driving instructor.
Coach Justin decided to go back to school to pursue his Doctorate in Astro Physics.
His dream is to travel the galaxy.
Coach Rockson was killed after a malfunction in his brand new technologically advanced 2015 Chevy Colorado.
Better than the 9ers wasn't actually better than the niners.
Coach Jesse and the Mean Machine were killed at AT&T stadium.
Shortly after the disbandment of the XFL, Coach Covfefe pursued his dream of becoming a social activist, fighting for equality and helping those in need.
The Baugh pursued an acting career in Hollywood, making several mediocre movies.
Never to return to the Mustangs like he promised.
Coach Victor left San Francisco in exile shortly after his season ended.
Rumor has it that he is traveling across space time to another dimension.
Coach Ken's body was found near Gettysburg.
He too, was destroyed, just like them.
Minh and the Outlaws decided to join TYFA, where their team of Professional Fantasy Superstars dominate little children.
Alvin Kamara of the Mustangs, turned to a life of crime, selling drugs for an up and coming dealer name Marlo Stealthy.
Alvin Kamara was shot and killed in a gang shoot out.
Ja Rule works as a correspondent for CNN.
His expertise in various subject matters is of vital importance.
Mr. McMahon was killed once again in the AT&T Stadium explosion.
Directed By
Mean Machine
Narrated By
Liev Schreiber
Executive Producer
Vince Gilligan
Executive Producer
Vince McMahon
Executive Producer
Floyd Mayweather Jr.
Executive Producer
Dwayne "The Baugh" Johnson
John Seana
Balor.
Do you remember me?
Balor
Your mom's name was Martha.
You used to wear wristbands on your arm.
Big E. Langston
This would've been a lot easier a week ago.
John Seana
If we called PUP...
Big E. Langston
Nah, he won't believe us.
John Seana
But even if he did...
Big E. Langston
Who knows if The Patriots would let him.
John Seana
We're on our own.
Big E. Langston
Maybe not...
I know a guy.
Cast
The Flames Rock's Team
Mean Machine Mean Machine
T.C. Titans MadeWCCGreatAgain
Permian Panthers Coach Covfefe
Thundering Herd Make FF Great Again
Average Justin's Justin's Team
Mud Dogs Howard's Team
The Mustangs #7StormsComing
Little Giants Sarcastaballs
The Coyotes Stealthy's Team
The Sharks Better than the 9ers
The Outlaws Minh's Team
Storylines Stolen From
WWE
Remember the Titans
Any Given Sunday
Friday Night Lights
The Longest Yard
Gridiron Gang
Dodgeball
Marvel's Avengers Infinity War
Batman Returns
Paid in Full
Coach Carter
Fantasy Dealer
I got that Ju Ju Smith!
Come get that Schuster!
Fantasy Dealer
We got that Philly.
*Whistling to the tune of The Farmer in the Dell*
Unknown
Aye, you the man with them 2018 Cheat Sheets?
Fantasy Dealer
How many you fucking want?
Victor Oumar
I'll take about 300-400.
Fantasy Dealer
Damn....
Victor Oumar
Hahaha....
All in the game, yo.
All in the game.
Written by
Mean Machine
Visual Effects by
Google Images
Makeagif.com
Youtube
Blogspot.com
Special Thanks to
Russia
Spcial Thanks to
Stan Lee
The Sports Movie Cinematic Universe Will Not Return in 2018
Sovereign Chambermaid
High priestess, The Patriots are waiting.
High Priestess
They are perturbed I've lost to Rockson.
High Priestess
When they see what I have created here, their wrath will dissipate.
Sovereign Chambermaid
It's a new type of... Wakadan Warrior... ma'am?
High Priestess
That, my child, is the next step in our evolution.
More powerful, more beautiful - more capable of winning the League Championship in the West Coast Cousins.
I think I shall call him.....
Avon.
