Earth-KANG
Narrator
As we open on the season finale of Wednesday Night Preview,
we return to Kang's base as the Conqueror has his sights on his next target.
Kang the Conqueror
Where are with the doctor?
Lloyd Hansen
We've got confirmation from Bane.
He's got the device and Oppenheimer is already making the final adjustments.
We're ready to deploy as soon as it's finished, Kang.
Kang the Conqueror
Good.
How is Nathaniel doing?
Selina Kyle
I've tracked his movements back to Earth-1, my Conqueror.
He's with Ouroboros at Lumon Industries.
Kang lightly touches his face, rubbing against his scars.
Kang the Conqueror
And around and around we go... just a matter of time now.
The Baugh
The Bishops stand ready at your command, Conqueror.
Where do you want us?
Kang the Conqueror
Earth-1887.
They are long overdue.
The Bishop
Yes, sir.
Justinmonger
The Riddler variants are in place.
We also have the baseball player onboard.
We're ready, Kang.
Kang the Conqueror
Anything else?
Selina Kyle
To Justinmonger:
Aren't you going to tell him...?
Justinmonger appears uneasy, annoyed at Selina.
Kang the Conqueror
Tell me what?
Selina Kyle
Selina Kyle
The Scarlet Joyce is gone.
She's escaped, my Conqueror.
Kang looks out into the distance, marveling at the multiverse.
Justinmonger
Do you want us to go after her?
Kang the Conqueror
Go after her....?
She'd kill you before you even got close to her.
Justinmonger
So what do you want us to do?
Kang the Conqueror
Kang the Conqueror
We proceed as planned.
Once we have the Dark Phoenix on our side, there's no need for the Scarlet Joyce.
Then, it will only be a matter of time before I find her.
The peril of the multiverse stands within my grasp.
The unmaking of every world lies ahead.
Prepare my ship for Earth-97.
Narrator
Elsewhere in Earth-KANG,
we find the eliminated Fantasy Managers huddled in a corner.
John Seana, Drew Minhtyre, Keenan Allen,
Sandy Orton and CM PUP meet as we've reached the final week.
John Seana
I know we all have our differences and we don't always get along.
But what I have to share is more important than
any petty differences we may have with one another.
I know, we've all been gathered here from universes all across the multiverse.
But I wasn't recruited for the Kang Games.
I'm a variant from another world and I've inherited the body of this John Seana.
I'm here to stop Kang.
Drew Minhtyre
Oh God... not this shit again.
If you've brought us here for another come to Jesus meeting, then you've wasted my time.
Sandy Orton
Hey, Drew. Shut your mouth.
I want to hear what Seana has to say...
because the truth is, I wasn't invited to the Kang Games either.
I was brought here.
And ever since that time, I've been trying to figure out what's going on.
John Seana
Listen, this is exactly what Kang wants.
He wants to divide us, for us to fight amongst ourselves.
He knows we're more deadly when we band together.
And I think Kang is going to make his move soon...
He's already taken out Kevin Owens, Justin Styles, AL-LEX Knight...
And last night, he took out Vincent Rhodes and Rockson Reigns as well.
Drew Minhtyre
Those guys had it coming...
The No Kangs Movement... did you really think that was going to fly?
They started a revolution and now the chickens have come home to roost.
CM PUP
Hey asshole, what about Tai Rollins?
That little snake made a deal with the devil and now they're coming after us.
Can't you get it through your thick skull that something bigger is going on?
Or are you too stupid to follow basic logic?
Drew Minhtyre
Listen, you little twerp.
If you wanna go... we can go... just say the word.
You little punk bitch...
John Seana
Guys... guys-
The Alarm Bells goes off.
Kang's mercenaries along with an army of flying monkeys enter the room.
Vincent 'Kang' McMahon
Do I smell a coup?
I'm sorry, but the time for revolution is over.
John Seana, I hope you had fun playing the hero.
Now, witness the consequences of your little game.
John Seana
Wait... wait... wait-
Vincent 'Kang' McMahon
Open fire.
Kang's soldiers unload a barrage of gunfire at the eliminated Managers.
WEST COAST KANG:
THE RISE OF THE CONQUEROR
Episode Seventeen -
FantasyMania XVII Championship
Michael Cole
Ladies and gentlemen, it is Week 17 and you know what that means!
Happy holidays and welcome to the Championship Round of FantasyMania XVII!
Michael Cole
Michael Cole, alongside Pat McAfee and Jerry 'The Kang' Lawler
at ringside as we have reached the season finale of Wednesday Night Preview.
And Pat, it all comes down to this.
Loud Play Justin and Return of the Mac have survived the playoff gauntlet
and now find themselves one win away from being crowned the winner of the 2025 Kang Games.
Pat McAfee
That's right, Cole. During these last few weeks,
there isn't a Fantasy Manager that has played better than these two individuals.
For the first time since 2018, we will have a League Champion who has never won it before.
What a story it has been for these two Fantasy Managers and it all culminates this Sunday
in our Championship Match of FantasyMania XVII.
[3] Return of the Mac (9-5)
[4] Loud Play Justin (9-5)
Michael Cole
I think you hit it on the head, Pat.
These two have fought tooth and nail to get here.
Whether it be Loud Play Justin, who left the WCC in 2021,
after finishing in last place in 2020, he rebuilt himself and now for the first time in his career,
Loud Play Justin is in the Championship Game of FantasyMania.
Or whether it be Chris F'in Law, who also finished in last place a season ago.
CFL has reloaded and come back stronger than ever.
Pat McAfee
It's absolutely wild to think that the last time these two played in the West Coast Cousins,
they both were in last place, but now find themselves one win away from being League Champion.
Started from the bottom, now we're here!
Michael Cole
A lot to talk about as we head into the final matchup of the season.
The Ring General, Justher.
A blackbelt in jitsu, having choked out John Seana and Vincent Rhodes in back to back weeks...
And CFL, taking down legends in the Fantasy Sports world in Sandy Orton and Rockson Reigns.
The early lines have Loud Play Justin as a slight favorite, but in my opinion,
I view this matchup as truly 50/50, it could go either way, Pat.
Pat McAfee
I think those lines might shift as the week continues,
but while CFL has a lot of firepower when it comes to Josh Allen, CMC and Puka Nacua,
I do feel Justher has the more well rounded team.
But anything can happen in the Championship Match...
We're just gonna have to wait 'til Sunday to find out.
BURN IT DOWN!
*Tai Rollins' Music Hits*
*Crowd Boos*
Michael Cole
And of course... who can forget this guy.
He calls himself the Architect, but he's more like an arsonist!
Burn it down is right...
In case you missed our recap, Tai Rollins was revealed to be the Masked Man,
and he took matters into his own hands last night in the Semi-Finals of FantasyMania,
getting involved in both matchups helping Justher beat Vincent Rhodes
and also screwing over Rockson Reigns as CFL took advantage...
We also can't forget about that parasite, Paul Heyman, turning his back on his Tribal Chief.
Pat McAfee
Well, say what you want, but Tai Rollins had a plan and he executed it to perfection.
You might not like his tactics, but I want to hear what he has to say.
He's the 2024 League Champion, had himself a bad year in 2025,
but somehow, he's still involved in the final week of FantasyMania.
You've got to give credit where credit is due, Cole.
Michael Cole
If you call being a scumbag a tactic, then more power to ya.
But I, for one, can't stand Tai Rollins.
Council of Kangs
oooohhHH.....OHHHH.....OHHHH.....
oooohhHH.....OHHHH.....OHHHH.....
OHHHH......OHHHH.....
Michael Cole
As we get a look at the prestigious League Championship.
The 2025 Kang Games is drawing to a close.
In just 4 nights, we will crown the winner of the Kang Games
between Loud Play Justin and Return of the Mac.
But now let's see what Tai Rollins and Paul Heyman have to say.
Paul Heyman
Ladies and gentlemen... MY NAME IS PAUL HEYMAN...
*Crowd Boos*
Paul Heyman
And what you all witnessed last night in the Semi-Finals of FantasyMania
is the future of Professional Fantasy Managing.
What happened last night is what we call a paradigm shift.
As the true architect, as the true visionary,
Tai "Freakin'" Rollins saw the future.
He saw that the future lies in Justher.
The future lies in Chris Fuckin' Law.
Paul Heyman
The glory days of the Circle of Champions...
Those days are over.
If you think I was going to hitch my wagon to an overrated, overachieving,
hyped up, glorified B tier Fantasy Manager like Rockson Reigns,
then you don't know Paul Heyman!
*Crowd Boos*
Paul Heyman
From this day henceforth, we do not bow down to The Best in the League.
We do not smell what The Final Boss is cookin'.
We don't stand on Hustle, Loyalty and Respect.
And we certainly do not acknowledge a Tribal Chief.
*Crowd Boos*
Paul Heyman
No, we kill the Legend of the Legend Killer.
And we finish stories for those who feel so entitled,
with everybody sayin' Tai "Freakin'" Rollins - YEAH!
This is just the inevitable course of the West Coast Cousins.
The Architect, Tai "Freakin'" Rollins knew this.
After all, he's the one who started this whole thing.
Yeah, that's right. And we don't talk about that enough, do we?
Paul Heyman
Tai Rollins understands that this league
will only survive if new talent continue to develop.
And that's exactly why Tai has invested in Justher.
Paul Heyman
It's why he's invested in CFL, Josh Allen and Kevin Breakker.
Council of Kangs
WOOF! WOOF! WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!
Paul Heyman
Make no mistake about it.
Tai Rollins is not here to steal the spotlight.
In this moment, at this stage, it is about the main event of FantasyMania.
It is about Loud Play Justin and Return of the Mac.
But as Kang's new Frontman,
Tai Rollins is here to usher in the future of the West Coast Kang.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you the epidemy of the epiphany,
the Visionary, the Architect...
the REAL GOAT of West Coast Cousins...
Get on your feet and acknowledge Tai "Freakin'" Rollins!
*Crowd Boos*
Tai "'Freakin'" Rollins
Hahahaha.... Riyadh, Saudi Arabia.
I couldn't have said it better myself....
I guess this is what it feels like to have a Wiseman.
Tai "'Freakin'" Rollins
Look, I won't belabor the point.
We have a Championship Match to get to and we have a League Champion to crown.
So I'll just say this... at the end of the day,
I know what you're all thinking.
You think I'm a sellout.
I started the No Kangs Movement... and now here I am, working for Kang.
Tai "'Freakin'" Rollins
When push comes to shove, this is all about survival.
I'm no hero. I'm not martyr.
And I'm tired of pretending to be one.
It's self-preservation above all else.
And if you're all too dense realize that, then you're dumber than you look.
Tai "'Freakin'" Rollins
I have a new outlook on life and with this second chance that Kang has given me,
I'm not going to waste it.
I will usher in the future of this Fantasy League.
I've ridden it from crybabies like Vincent Rhodes and false prophets like Rockson Reigns.
And now, it's truly time to appreciate the very best that this League has to offer.
So without further adieu, with the power vested in me by Mr. Kang McMahon,
I have been given the privilege to oversee this contract signing
between our FantasyMania Finalists.
Introducing first.... The Devil Himself... Chris F'in Law!
*CFL's Music Hits*
Michael Cole
And there is the #3 seed in this year's playoffs.
After big wins against former League Champions in Sandy Orton and Rockson Reigns,
I guess you could say CFL is creating a resume for being a Legend Killer.
CFL defeated Rockson Reigns 126.80 - 112.06, pulling off the upset.
And guys, our FantasyMania Main Eventers had eerily similar performances this past weekend.
Outside of the Tai Rollins interference, the score in our Semi-Finals matchups were nearly identical.
Pat McAfee
It's a true tossup, Cole.
Thus far in the playoffs, Loud Play Justin has outplayed CFL,
but with so much firepower at the top of his roster, I could see Chris winning it all.
*Crowd Cheers*
Michael Cole
And check this out! Wasting no time, CFL signs the contract!
Chris F'in Law will officially participate in the Championship Match of FantasyMania XVII!
CFL
Saudi Arabia, let me make one thing perfectly clear.
In four nights, I will officially be crowned as the winner of the 2025 Kang Games,
and I will complete what will be the biggest
one season turnaround in West Coast Cousins history!
You see, I haven't forgotten.
I haven't forgotten that a season ago, I was laughed out the building!
In my worst season as a Professional Fantasy Manager,
finishing 1-13, the entire world was ready to write me off.
CFL
But I haven't forgotten. CMC hasn't forgotten.
And for every son of a bitch that has ever doubted me... I say, look at me now!
I mean, really. Let's run through the list.
Rockson Reigns - beat him. AL-LEX Knight - beat him.
CM PUP - beat him. Sandy Orton - beat her too.
John Seana - beat him. The Baugh - I beat him as well.
CFL
Hell, Tai Rollins sorry to say it, but I beat you too.
I don't say that to toot my own horn...
well, who am I kidding? Yeah, I am tooting my own horn.
CFL
But what is it that my good buddy Vinny likes to say?
"You build them up and I'll knock them down!"
Except... I'm actually knocking them down, Vincent.
Unlike you, not only do I talk to the talk, but I walk the walk.
I'm the only Fantasy Manager that's worth a damn!
CFL
You see, I meant every word that I said in last week's Semi-Finals press conference.
I meant every word when I ran down your Tribal Chief.
I spoke it into existence.
I destroyed the Circle of Champions!
Consider this Sunday my coronation because The Devil rises to the top.
This Sunday, I make my mark on history.
I cement my name among the League's Champions.
And with my coronation, I officially usher in a new era.
CFL
An era where the next generation of Fantasy Managers take over.
Hell, my opponent. The Ring General, Justher.
I applaud your efforts, because like me, you have put these old timers to bed.
But you see, there is a difference between me and you.
And the difference is quite simple.
The difference is what is going to lead me to win on Sunday...
And that difference is...
BECAUSE I'M BETTER THAN YOU... AND YOU KNOW IT!
Tai "'Freakin'" Rollins
Hahahaha.... well said.
And now that we have that out of the way.
Let's bring out your opponent in this year's Championship Match.
THE RING GENERAL.... JUSTHER!
*Justher's Music Hits*
*Crowd Boos*
Michael Cole
And as we await the entrance of the Ring General,
Loud Play Justin has been on an absolute tear as of late.
Since Week 14, Loud Play Justin hasn't scored less than 125 points.
Can he keep his momentum going into the Final week of FantasyMania?
The camera cuts to the entrance ramp, as Justher has yet to make his entrance.
Pat McAfee
Well, I think Justher might be having some sort of technical difficulty...
I don't see him, guys.
We cut to backstage as the crowd erupts.
Justher has been attacked!
*Crowd Cheers*
Michael Cole
My God! That's... That's Justin Styles!
Justin Styles is back!
Jerry 'The Kang' Lawler
That's impossible...
Justin Styles
Tai "Freakin'" Rollins.
You made one mistake when you went after me...
You didn't kill me!
Justin Styles
Tai, when the time is right, you're gonna get what's coming to ya.
You betrayed the brotherhood.
You betrayed the No Kangs Movement and you're gonna get yours.
But for now... I'm taking back what's mine!
Justin Styles
CFL... you don't want none!
*Justin Styles' Music Hits*
*Crowd Cheers*
Michael Cole
AND HERE HE IS....
The Phenomenal Loud Play Justin!
After being viciously assaulted by the Masked Man in Week 14,
Justin Styles has returned to the West Coast Cousins!
Pat McAfee
And I think he's brought some friends with him this time...
IT'S THE BULLET CLUB!
Pat McAfee
Take a look at CFL and Josh Allen...
Pat McAfee
..it looks like they've just seen a ghost!
Michael Cole
They have, Pat!
When we last saw Justin Styles, his throat was slashed.
He was sent to the hospital and we never got word on his condition.
But it seems as if Justin Styles is BACK!
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Justin Styles
CFL... you wanna make this about the future of this Fantasy League.
You wanna talk about the next generation of the West Coast Cousins.
You're looking at the next generation of the West Coast Cousins!
Justin Styles
But I'll tell you this.
This ain't about breaking the Circle of Champions.
This ain't about whose got next. Nah, this is about legacy.
This is about the WCC League Championship!
And it's about keeping it within the cousins.
This is about keeping it within the Luu Family!
And come Sunday, I'm going to stop you
and I'm going to become the NEXT League Champion!
Justin Styles signs the contract as the crowd goes wild.
Michael Cole
It's official! Loud Play Justin and Return of the Mac
will face off for the 2025 League Championship!
Who will be crowned the winner of the Kang Games?!
Find out this Sunday for our finale of West Coast Kang!
We will see you Sunday for the biggest event of the year!
*Commercial*
*Commercial*
Earth-1
Nathaniel Richards
OB, who is credited for writing the TVA Handbook?
Ouroboros
Evelyn Kier.
Enraged, Nathaniel begins to break equipment in the lab at Lumon.
Nathaniel Richards
Goddamnit!
They took everything from me!
My life's work, everything I have worked towards, they just... took it.
Ouroboros
Nathaniel! Stop!
Calm down, you have to let Evelyn explain.
Nathaniel Richards
Over my dead body.
Ouroboros
You're going to destroy everything...
Nathaniel Richards
What does it matter?
It's my work, not theirs!
Ouroboros
Nathaniel.... why couldn't you have stayed calm for once?
Instead of flying off the handle?!
I hope you're happy!
Ouroboros
I hope you're happy now...
I hope you're happy how you've hurt your cause forever...
I hope you think you're cleveeeeer-
Nathaniel Richards
I hope you're happy!
I hope you're happy too...
I hope you're proud how you would grovel in submission...
To feed your own ambitionnnn...
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Nathaniel Richards & Ouroboros
So though I can't imagine howwwwww....
I hope you're happy right.... nowwwwww....
Mr. Graner from Lumon Securities enters the room.
Mr. Graner
Nathaniel R., this is a restricted area.
I'm going to have to ask that you come with me.
Ouroboros
Nathaniel, we should do what Mr. Graner says.
Nathaniel Richards
No.
Ouroboros
There's nothing to be afraid of...
Nathaniel Richards
I'm not afraid.
It's Kier who should be afraid of me!
Ouroboros
Nathaniel, listen to me, just say you're sorry.
Ouroboros
You can still be with Kier...
What you've worked and waited for...
You can have all you eveeerrr wanted...
Nathaniel Richards
I know.
Nathaniel Richards
But I don't want it....
No, I can't want it... annnymoooreeee...
Nathaniel Richards
Something has changed within me...
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the ruleeess of someone else's game
Too late for seconding-guessing
Too late to go back to sleeeeep....
It's time to trust my instincts, close my eyes... and leeeeeaaaaaap....
Nathaniel Richards
It's time to try de-ffyiiing gravity
I think I'll try de-ffyiiing gravity
And you can't pull me downnnn....
Ouroboros
Can't I make you understand
You're having delusions of grandeuuuur...?
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Nathaniel Richards
I'm through accepting limits
Cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change, but 'til I try, I'll never knowww
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love, I guess I've lossst...
Well, if that's love, it comes at much too high a cooossst
I'd sooner buy de-fyiiing gravity
Kiss me goooooodbyeeee, I'm de-fyiiing gravity
And you can't pull me downnn...
Mr. Graner
That's enough. We've contacted the authorities.
I'm sure they'll be pleased to catch the man who murdered Ravonna Renslayer.
Nathaniel Richards
Fine. So be it.
Ouroboros
Nathaniel... what are you doing?
Nathaniel Richards
What I should have done a long time ago...
Nathaniel uses his technology from across the multiverse to suit up.
Ouroboros
Please... listen to me! Stop!
Mr. Graner
Nathaniel! That's enough!
Ouroboros
You don't know what you're doing...
Nathaniel unleashes a burst of power that disintegrates Mr. Graner.
Ouroboros
STOP!
Ouroboros
Nathaniel... what have you done?
Kang the Conqueror
I've only done what was necessary.
Kang the Conqueror
OB, trust me when I say this...
I understand now what I must do. Who I must become.
I don't know how to explain this or how I know,
but I just know that I must follow my destiny.... I can fix everything.
Ouroboros
Fix what...?
Kang the Conqueror
Kang the Conqueror
The Multiverse.
I have to become him.
Ouroboros
Him....?
Ouroboros
Who do you have to become...?
Kang the Conqueror
I have to become Kang the Conqueror.
Kang the Conqueror
Come with me.
Think of what we could do... together.
....
Unliiimited....
Together, we're unliiimited
Together, we'll be the greatest team there's ever been....
OB... dreams the way we planned 'em
Ouroboros
If we work in tandem...
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Kang the Conqueror & Ouroboros
There's no fight we cannot winnn...
Just you and IIII.... de-fyiiing gravity....
With you and IIII.... de-fyiiing gravity....
Kang the Conqueror
They'll never bring us down...
Kang the Conqueror
Are you coming?
Ouroboros
Nathaniel...
Ouroboros
I hope you're happy...
Now that you're choosing this...
Kang the Conqueror
You too.
I hope it brings you bliss...
Kang the Conqueror & Ouroboros
I really hope you get it
And you don't live to regret ittt....
I hope you're happy in the ennddd....
I hope you're happy.... my friennddd....
Mr. Drummond and additional security enter.
Mr. Drummond
There he is!
Arrest that man... and bring Douglas O. to me!
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Nathaniel fights off Lumon security, only to be scarred in the face.
Kang the Conqueror
No! Leave him alone!
He hasn't done anything wrong!
He hasn't done anything wrong!
I'm the one you want...
I'm the one you want! IT'S ME.....!
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Kang the Conqueror
IT'S MEEEEE!
SO IF YOU CARE TO FIND MEEEE....
LOOK TO THE WESTERN SKYYYY....
AS SOMEONE TOLD ME LATELY....
"EVERYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FLYYYY"
Kang the Conqueror
And if I'm flying solo...
At least I'm flying freeee....
To those who ground me, take a message back from meeee....
Kang the Conqueror
Tell them how I am de-fyiiing gravity
I'M FLYING HIIIGH, DE-FYIIING GRAVITY
And soon, I'll match them in renownnnn....
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Evelyn Kier
Citizens of Kier, Nathaniel Richards is an enemy that must be found.
He is a traitor! A murderer!
Believe nothing he says.
He has stolen our theories and work on the multiverse.
He is a tyrant of time... he is evil... he is a warlord....
Evelyn Kier
....HE IS A CONQUEROR!
Evelyn Kier
His blue skin is but an outward manifestorium of his twisted nature.
This distortion, this replusion, this.... Wicked Conqueror....
Kang the Conqueror
Unliiimited....... unliiimited.....
UNLIIIMITEDDD.....
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Kang the Conqueror
NOBODY in all of the West Coast Cousins....
No Commissioner that there is or was...
IS EVER GONNA BRING MEEEEEE DOOOOWNNNNN.....
Ouroboros
I hope you're happyyyy....
LOOK AT HIM.... HE'S WICKED!
KILL HIM!
Kang the Conqueror
BRING ME DOWNNNN...
NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED,
SO WE'VE GOT TOOO...... BRIIING HIM.......
Kang the Conqueror
OHHH-AH....AHHHHH......!
DOOOWNNNNNNN......
DOOOOWNNNNNNN......!
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